I want to share with you an article in the latest San Francisco Chronicle, titled, Women see less need for ol’ ball and chain, by C.W. Nevius. Here’s the intro:
Are husbands becoming obsolete? You have to wonder. A recent New York Times study, based on 2005 census results, found that for the first time in American history there are more women living without husbands (51 percent) than with them.
To which many men must reply: Uh-oh. After all, how many times did they tell us to put down the toilet seat and pick up our socks? Could it be that a hubby is — like the big, smelly dog that keeps chewing up shoes — turning out to be more trouble than he’s worth?
Please read it and report back to me what you think.
Meanwhile, occasionally, a well-meaning friend will ask why Miguel has not proposed yet. I wish that they would ask him that. Two years ago, when we were in France, meeting my great-distant aunt Marie for the first time, she actually asked me, “Is it that you don’t want to get married?”
Why is all the pressure on me?
“I took matters into my own hands,” my friend Lonnie* told me once. “I took him to the jewelry store and showed him what ring I wanted. I figured if that didn’t give him the hint, nothing would.”
How pro-active, I thought.
I like having companionship. I also like having my own apartment. So what am I supposed to do. I’m happy now.
This isn’t like how it was in my twenties, when all my girlfriends were getting married. I wanted to get married, too. But what motivated me then wasn’t the prospect of life-long companionship. It was the wedding. The big party. I wanted one, too. It was a fleeting desire, though.
I once had this boyfriend who said that married women, particularly mothers, who still train for sports, like triathlons, swimming, running, what-have-you, are selfish. Note that we are not together today.
My gramma said that we should all have children so we’ll have someone there to take care of us in our old age. But as I’m the one who lived with her until she finally passed away, I know that what she really meant to say is that we should all have grandchildren.
I just haven’t figured out how to skip straight to grandchildren yet.
*No way is that her real name!